Just Wanted to Say Thanks!

The student ministry at West Acres just finished a busy weekend. On Friday, we had parents, students, and volunteers set up for our Feast. On Saturday, we held the Feast like Luke 14 tells us to. It was a great day! Thank you to all of the volunteers who made it happen. As busy as the weekend was, the stress was minimal. That is because of the amount of people we had working. I hope you were as blessed as I was by the experience. To finish the weekend off, we had our Christmas Party on Sunday night. We had a great crowd, good food, good music, and cheesy games (including the sweaters).

So, I just wanted to give a BIG thank you to all who made this weekend possible. We should do it again before next Christmas!


THANK YOU!

Having Fun Parenting!

It's been a little while since I posted on here. I said I would try more and I haven't done well with that. My apologies. I figured I would try to let you in our my thought process in reading some of the books that have been in front of me. Here we go!

I just starting reading a book called "Shepherding a Child's Heart" by Ted Tripp. Really, I just starting reading it. This next quote is from the introduction, that's how far I have read. Tell me what you think:


“My observation after thirty-five years of school administration, parenting, pastoral work, and counseling is that children generally do not resist authority that is truly kind and selfless.”

Excerpt From: Tripp, Tedd. “Shepherding a Child's Heart (Enhanced Version).” Shepherd Press, 2011-08-26. iBooks.
This material may be protected by copyright.

I remember learning from college in my "Child Development Psychology Class" that there are several types of parenting:

Authoritative, Authoritian, and Permissive.

Christian or not, most believe that the authoritative parenting style is best. Using your authority that is naturally given to you by the relationship and using it kindly and selflessly seems to be the best. What do you think? Which parenting style have you used? What advice would you give?

Am I Really an Expert on Parenting Teenagers?!

Wait, I’m the expert on parenting teens?!

There is a lot to that little statement. I know a lot about teenagers. I have worked with them for 10+ years. I have read books about them. I’ve spent countless hours in meetings talking about them. I’ve played every game and seen more girls cry than I care to. BUT, there is one thing I have never done, parent them. I became a parent a little over two years ago. Life has changed drastically since then. I love being a parent. It is not easy being a parent. It has also affected the way I see student ministry.

My job as a pastor is to equip the saints for the work of the ministry. (Ephesians 4:12) My job gets more specific because I am asked to work with students from 6^th grade until 12^th grade. Most of the teenagers that I work with have at least one parent in their life.

So am I really an expert? No…

Let me give you a few ideas:

HONOR & EQUIP

The Bible tells us that the spiritual responsibility of the child is the parents’, not mine. I MUST honor the responsibility given from Scripture. You should never hear me (or any other youth leader) talk badly about a parent to a student. (It happens in my mind sometimes, but that’s where it should stay.) My job is to HONOR the parents for what God has given them. I am on the same team as the parent. A parent knows their student much more than I do. Parents will pay for student’s food, clothes, school and marriage. I MIGHT show up for the wedding if the student remembers me.

I know it’s frustrating, for most student pastors, that parents aren’t “discipling” their teenagers. The one question I have is: who “discipled” the parent? My job as a student pastor is to EQUIP and help the parents make that kind of connection with their teenagers where they can have meaningful and life-changing interactions.

BECOME A TEAMMATE

I love sports. (Just ask my wife, she hates Sportscenter.) I have always played team sports. Families are a lot like teams. Everyone kind of knows their role whether they like it or not. The youth leader has to be on the same team as the parent. I have found that working with teenagers (even the best ones), they usually tell me just their side of the story. If I were to go ask their parent(s) about the situation, there would be new information involved. It’s amazing some of the details students tend to leave out when they are telling me their side of the story.

Since my family is just getting started, I want to hang around other families to see how they do it. My wife and I will talk about some of the things we see and we try to figure out if that’s how we want to do it or not. If you are a youth worker, why don’t you try and spend some time with a student AND their family? You could probably learn a lot about both!

That’s all I got for now, just had some things going through my mind about my work. I’m going to try and keep this blog up a little better than in the past. (2 years is too long!)

Youth Leader Training Event 2010

On Saturday, February 27, we held our annual Youth Leader Training Event. This is put on by the Augusta Baptist Association and myself.

I am able to bring some youth ministry friends from around the state and even some new ones through friends. We invite youth pastors, leaders, volunteers, parents or anybody who is interested in working with students.

It's amazing because we run the whole spectrum of leaders. From full-time youth pastors to volunteer youth leaders. I met one guy who has worked the last 6 years at his church for no money and he only has two students. The great moment happened when Matt Lawson, High School Pastor at FBC Woodstock, was able to encourage this leader.

That's why I love doing this event. We didn't have the crowd I wanted. Everything did not go as planned. However, we are able to connect leaders and volunteers in ways that will see fruit in the future.

To God be the glory!

Being a Father

Well, it has been a little over 10 weeks into my journey as a father. Josiah is amazing. He really is a good baby. I think God knew we wouldn't be able to handle a crazy baby. He is beautiful. He looks like his Momma, thank goodness.

The reality of him being here is starting to set in. One of the biggest things that God has been teaching me is about the Father's love. I would do anything for Josiah. He has done nothing to earn my love except come into this earth. In fact, I KNOW that there will be many times in the future that he will disobey me, disrespect me, talk back to me and even call me names. But...I still love him. I still will do anything for him. That doesn't matter. He could wish that he was born to different parents, but I still love him.

So, if my imperfect love can do that, how much more does God our Father love us.

Matthew 7:11

Josiah is Here!

Well, like most expectations, ours have been shattered. Our baby, Josiah, came about 3 weeks early. He weighed 5 lbs 11oz. He was 18 1/2 inches.

He is absolutely beautiful.

We spent 6 days and 5 nights in the hospital. Two of those days were before his birth. Aimee was having some issues.

Parenthood is strange. It is still surreal. Reality has not set in. I am holding him right now and it is way too early for a youth pastor to be awake. Still, the reality has not set in.

Well, here he is:

A New House!

Well Summer is coming to a close today. School starts tomorrow and life will slow down a little bit until the end of October when Mr. Josiah gets here. Last week, we moved into our new house in Summerlin. We love it. We are so thankful to God for what He has given us. It doesn't quite feel like home yet, but it will get there.

We had a good Summer over all. From all the camps and events over the Summer, God has been good. For the next few weeks and months, we will see how people allow God to work in their lives even when school is in.

Hopefully, I will be able to post on here a little more now that life is slowing down a little bit.

It's All in the Family

So I am in Kansas City, Missouri. I am here with about 85 people who claim me as family. There are 42 kids and 43 adults. The weather has been pretty good. Saturday has been a little cooler than expected. It has been a great time to relax and even meet family that I don't remember or I haven't seen in years. There are also kids here that were not even alive the last time I saw their family.

One of my cousins works for Christ In Youth (CIY). We had a great discussion today about leaders and small groups. He is writing a book to help train volunteer leaders. It was a good time. It's cool to see how people are similar even though they live hundred of miles away. We work for different denominations but we serve the same God.

The one thing I love about my family, even though we don't see them often, is our love for God and family dynamics. Most families these days have some issues:

1. They don't even want to meet together for a family reunion.

2. God is not the center of most of their lives, so they are missing a common bond.

3. Our families are willing to help each other out no matter what the situation.

Even though we don't keep up with most of our family during the year (except through Facebook), our love for family and our Savior makes coming together a great time.

It's been a while...

Sorry that I haven't posted here in awhile. Things have been really busy and somethings are getting ready to change. If your only connection to me is this blog, you might want to know that Aimee and I are expecting a little boy in November. His name is Josiah. We don't have a middle name yet, still working on that.
Hopefully this weekend, we will have a contract on our house. We are looking at building our next house. We have a really good deal in the process.
Things have been pretty busy at church. We leave for Impact in a week. Another team in going to Belize two weeks after that. Then, we have our normal youth camp in July. In the middle of all that, we have a family reunion to attend.
Today, Jeff and I started a new thing where we take 1 day a month and turn our cell phones off and just spend time with God and his Word. It didn't really go as planned. I ended up in a meeting that I forgot was already planned. I was able to spend most of the afternoon in quiet and reading.
I read through the book of Nehemiah. It is the book we are using at Impact. I really just wanted God to speak through it without the curriculum. The character and integrity that Nehemiah has was astounding. He would not let anyone or anything stray him from doing God's work. There was power, position and wealth all at his finger tips, yet he chose to do the right thing. I hope to continue to become that kind of man. God-willing.

Turning 30

So I turned 30 yesterday. It was kind of weird and kind of normal. The day was pretty normal. It was Black Friday, so Aimee and I went by the mall but I thought the "sales" were terrible. She bought a shirt, but that was it. Oh yeah, I bought myself a new truck for the first time. I have been driving the same truck since high school. I really like the truck, but I don't know if I will like the payments.

But back to turning 30.

First, I don't feel 30 at all. Working with middle school students keeps you young. I always feel like people are older than me. I kind of want to be like those guys who try to look at their lives from a different perspective and see if they are where they want to be. I have tried to do that and it just seems stupid. I hope I am where God wants me to be. I have a great wife, family and job. My friends are amazing. I really don't feel like anything is missing. Sure I have troubles and issues like everyone else, but I am pretty satisfied with where God has me. I hope the next 30 years are as much fun as the first 30 have been.

Thank you to all of you who have been a part it so far.

China Review

In case you didn’t know, I had the opportunity to travel to China from September 9 – 21. It was my first experience out of our country and an experience that I will never forget. I want to start off this note by stating some of the obvious things and then get to what I thought my Father was teaching me.
First, there are people EVERYWHERE! China has an estimated 1 billion people living in the country. That’s almost 3 times the amount of people we have in the States. I can understand where the value of human life has decreased over there. I don’t agree with it, but can understand it. In the city that we were in, there were about 10 million people. At least 5 million people ride a scooter. Todd would fit right in with all the Chinese. One thing I would never do over there is drive. People in China do not know how to drive. Signals and lines on the road mean absolutely nothing. I asked our connection over there about getting a license and he said that it is hard to get a license and if you can’t pass the test, you can just pay for it! Our bus driver used his horn more in the 2 weeks than I have in my entire life.
Second, the food is terrible. Granted, this is coming from someone who is already a picky eater, but I tried some things are they were for the most part, terrible. In my photo albums on Facebook, you can see what I am talking about. From the fish head and tail still attached to actual chicken feet being in the soup, I hit my gag reflex several times on this trip. My friend Wayne and I lived on crackers and water for a long period of time. There were several things that I did enjoy, like dragon fruit, fried rice (not American style) and duck. We did find a McDonalds, KFC, and Pizza Hut over there and we lived off those things for the last couple of days. Whatever weight I lost in the first week, I gained back by the time we left.
Third, the beds were hard a rock. They do not know what a comforter is. We stayed in the 3 different hotels while we were over there and all of them had beds that were hard. The bathrooms were not something to be desired as well. While the hotels had western style bathrooms (even though you couldn’t put used toilet paper in the toilet), most bathrooms out it public were what we called ‘Squatty Potty’s.’ Basically, just a hole in the ground without plumbing. They were some the nastiest things I have ever smelled.
On to the things I was taught. The verse that was stuck in my head while we traveled was, “You are his workmanship, created in Him, to DO good works which He has prepared in advance for you to do.” I was ready to get to work while I was over there. We were visiting some cities that were devastated by the earthquake on May 12, 2008. That date is being memorialized like our 9-11. Our plans were changed often on this trip. It came to be very annoying while we were there. The villages and cities that we did visit were absolutely devastated. There were several schools that collapsed and many of the victims of this disaster where children. While we were not able to do all the things we wanted, we were able to give hope and encouragement to many people that we came into contact with. Whether they were organizations that were helping with disaster, to college students, to the village people who were seeing ‘white faces’ for the first time in their lives. These organizations were starting to get discouraged because of the lack of volunteer help and so we could encourage them. We meet people who lived in portable housing that was basically a bunch of one-room homes for 40,000 people.
The main thing that I walked away with was an awareness of things much bigger than me. It was like the time I went to the Grand Canyon as a child. Our Father has great plans for China, bigger than I have ever imagined and we need to keep them in our thoughts.

China Trip

So I am going to China on Tuesday, Sept 9 with some friends! I can't wait to go. I have never been out of the country. The jet lag and time change make me nervous but I am ready to go. I hate it that my wife can't go with me. That's the only thing that sucks. I hope we have a lot of success and not run into many problems. Say a little prayer for us, especially Aimee.

Leadership is...

So in all the busyness of transitioning to a new church, I am at a leadership retreat for our rising 8th graders and Seniors. We are teaching the students about 3 major topics:
1. Leadership is Influence. As John Maxwell says, 'Nothing more, nothing less.' Our students have to understand that they have influence because of their position but they must gain influence among the students if they want to be leaders.
2. Leadership has accountability. As 1 Tim 3 tells us, there is certain criteria laid out for those who desire a position of leadership. A leader has to be able to lead themselves, among others and among leaders. There is a certain level of accountability that comes with being a leader.
3. Leadership is servanthood. The book of Matthew tells us that those who want to be first must be last and those who wish to be great must serve. Jesus came to serve, not be served. If anybody could get away with being served, it was Jesus. It is our job to be like Christ, we must be servants.

Just thought I would let you in on what we were talking about today.

New Surroundings

So I have been in a new church for the past 29 days. The first week was really slow. After that, it was non-stop until this past Sunday. I have been in a 100 meetings and then we went to camp. My time here has been great. The students are great, the leaders are great and the staff is unbelievable. God is stretching me and I am loving it. My prayer is that God will give me the wisdom to do what is right and the strength to get it done.

Success as a Leader

For the past 5 or so years, I have been reading, learning, trying to figure out what it really means to be a leader. I have attended conferences, sat in meetings, and had discussions about the topic. The weird thing right now is that I am about to find out how good of a leader I have been in the past 4 1/2 years. In my transition to a new church, I leave behind a group of students on the verge of doing something great. There are several college volunteers along with several new graduates who are prepared to take over and hopefully do a better job than I did. The success of my leadership will be dependent on them taking what I have taught them and doing it themselves. I know that God is in control and He will do what He wants to do. These students have the opportunity to do the right thing and see other students come to know Jesus and have a better relationship with Him. I am sad to go, but I am excited about what God is doing here and where I go. To God be the glory, forever.

Changes

So, these past few months have been quite interesting. God has been working in ways that I have never expected. Like my last post, I understand that my faith in God is based upon Jesus and not my circumstances, but this has been a time when I get to put that faith (confidence) to the test.
The thing about change is that it is rarely easy. While I am excited on one side, I am not looking forward to the other side. I know that the emotion is coming but I don't really want to deal with it. I have been expecting the worst each time I have talked about the changes, only the best has come out. That makes me a little more worried about continuing the announcement.
So if you get to read this, just throw a little prayer up to our Father for us.

Understanding Faith

So we have been on the discussion of faith at our church for a while. I have been watching Andy Stanley's new series called 'Faith, Hope and Luck' and it is amazing. Andy does a great job on explaining what faith is and how it is accomplished in our lives. So many times, we connect our faith with our circumstances. If we do the right things, say the magical words, click our heals or give the right amount of money, our faith would be amazing. On the other hand, if times get tough or things don't work out the way we want them to, our faith can be crushed.
Our faith is based on circumstances. That is the problem. Our faith comes from one source alone. God grace given to us through the power of Jesus. The foundation of our faith is Jesus. What he did 2000 years ago is the only foundation for what we believe. If nothing else good ever happens in our lives, we know that God loves us and He sent his Son to die for us. That's it. Not an experience. Not a circumstance. Not a magic formula. The person of Jesus is all we need.
So how does God show this in my life? Let's just say that circumstances are frustrating and life doesn't always seem easy. Just another way for God to remind me that His strength is made perfect in my weakness. Just a reminder that when I am weak, He is strong.

Relationships

So I just got back from Norman Park, GA. There is a Georgia Baptist Center down there and I was there to meet with other youth pastors from Georgia. Now if you have never heard of Norman Park, don't worry, neither did I. The Baptist Center is really the only thing in the city. The city is about 30 minutes outside of Tifton, GA.
I knew about 8 of the 30 guys down there. These guys I know are from my neck of the woods and work with me at Impact (the greatest camp on the earth). A lot of these guys were from down south closer to Norman Park. They were very rural and country. I know that I am in the south but most of the guys I know are from the city.
The interesting thing to me is that student ministry is done the same way everywhere. One of our talks was about reaching out to different stereotypes. The main conclusion was relationships. Whether you were like or even liked the stereotype you were reaching out to, the main ingredient is relationship. Understand that you may not ever be like the student you are reaching out to, but realize that they are looking for real relationships. They want to see the real you and you need to show them the real Jesus through you.

Who will confess?

This past week has been exhausting. Here in Augusta, it has been Masters week. One of the greatest golf tournaments in the world is held here. Smart people in Augusta do one of two things. They either leave or work the Masters. For the past 3 years, I have worked the Masters. This year, it was with a group called Velocity Sports who contracts the event for IBM. I worked almost 100 hours in 1 week.
Even if you are not into golf, you have probably heard of the person who finished in 2nd place this year. His name is Tiger Woods and he will probably go down as the greatest golfer when his career is over. He has won the tournament 4 times and has finished 2nd the last 2 years. People (including other golfers) have confessed that he is the greatest golfer of our time.
This past Sunday, our Sunday School class was reading in Philippians 2. It talks about how Christ humbled himself and became obedient to death. He didn't consider his equality with God something to be grasped. When all was said and done, every person will confess that He is Lord. We may be confessing right now that Tiger is the greatest golfer. No one said that 30 years ago and they might be speaking of another golfer in 30 years from now. However, the name of Jesus is timeless. EVERYONE will confess that he is Lord.

March Madness

To me, this is the greatest time of year. The weather is getting warmer, my truck turns a shade of yellow, and the Men's NCAA Basketball Tournament is going on. Being a huge basketball fan, I am a little bias as to why this is the greatest time of year, but there is something about watching this tournament and trying to pick the winner that fascinates me and millions of others.
Last week, I turned in my brackets and I am watching closely to see if my picks hold up. There's nothing like cheering for the #1 team in the tournament. (North Carolina Tarheels) But there is one thing that I have noticed, like the millions of people who guess or "predict" who is going to win the tournament, many people do the same with their lives. Instead of making wise decisions, people make choices based on emotion and circumstance. Just like the people who pick a winner based on colors or mascots, many people make horrible decisions.
The truth for us as Christians is that God has mandated a wise choice. It is found in Ephesians 5. Paul tells us that we are to walk wisely. He commands us to make the most of every opportunity.
So enjoy the games, as I will, and remember to walk wisely.